So, it has come to my attention that more often than not, female cats are much more cuddly and crave human contact more than male cats. I'd say the same goes for people, but personally I'm not always cuddly/lovable.
I'm not writing it off just yet, though. I'd say I have the potential to one day share the same admirable values as a female cat. Sigh... one day...
And of course, there are cuddly male cats out there- Sometimes Marlow likes to brush up against my leg or sleep next to me, but then if I get overly-affectionate, he has no qualms about taking a claw to a shirt or an arm.
This is remniscent of some adults with attachment/trust/other issues, so it makes me wonder what such issues male cats could possibly have had to make them so prick-like. I mean, Marlow has an excuse, he was on the streets for 10 weeks or so before I found him. But what about the cats that come from breeders? They are the same way, aren't they?
I suppose this consistency lends itself to the idea that " They just like their independence because it is just how they are, they are natural loners" blah blah blah. But we say that about people, too, and we all know that every single "I iz independent, I don't need no one! I'm happy as a lark! Single power!" person is inherently lonely, no matter how many friends/aquaintences they have. So I guess maybe that's why we feel like we can continue to give them the petting and the belly scratching (the cats,people..the cats,) that they don't seem to want, because they may not always know it, but they need us, damn it! If they fight it, too bad- we're still going to do it again. They can talk about it in cat therapy.
Disclaimer: If you are in a relationship and have a secure attachment style (or, in other words, are the human equivalent of a female cat,) and what I'm saying is a bunch of jibberish to you, it is because you are currently immersed and preoccupied with normal, happy feelings of love for your partner, so you just feel free to move along and forget all of that rubbish up there ^...
Anyway, back on topic! (Was there one?) There are also, I'm sure, girl cats that will scratch your eyes out for holding them, (that's me if I were a cat--) but none that I have come across yet. At worst, I have received an occasional firm press of the paw to the chest signaling "Betch, plz put me down, thx."
Basically, I think that if some insignificant study were to be done on how many male cats fight being held vs. female cats, something tells me that female cats would let you hold them for a much longer period of time.
Pulitzer-Prize winning feline psychology writer,
Ashley M. Kennett
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